Dear Val,

I’ve been thinking about the things I should have said, and the things I never should have done. You deserved honesty, kindness, and someone who showed up for you. I know I haven’t always been that person, and I’m sorry.

I’m sorry for mistreating you. For the lies. For the hurt I caused and the trust I damaged. None of that was fair to you. There isn’t an excuse that makes it okay, and I don’t want to hide behind one.

I’m especially sorry for going silent when communication mattered most. When you needed clarity, I left you with questions. When we needed a conversation, I withdrew. I can see how that could leave you feeling unheard, alone, or like you didn’t matter. You did. You do. My silence was my responsibility, not something you should have had to carry.

You deserved better from me.
And I want to become better, not just say it.

I’m sorry for all of it — the moments I’ve named and the ones I may not fully understand yet. If you ever choose to tell me how it felt for you, I want to listen without defending myself or making your feelings about me.

I promise to put real effort into becoming a better person, for myself and for you. That means telling the truth even when it’s uncomfortable, treating you with care, and having the conversations I used to avoid. If I need time to gather my thoughts, I will say that clearly instead of disappearing, and follow through on coming back to the conversation.

I know a letter can’t rebuild trust. Only consistent actions over time can do that. I don’t expect these words to fix everything, and I’m not asking you to forgive me before you’re ready. You get to decide what you need, including space, and I will respect that.

Thank you for reading this. You don’t have to reply. I just needed you to hear an honest apology, without excuses, and know that I’m taking responsibility for the person I choose to be from here.